Stop Reacting.
Start Relating With Clarity.

Relationship Support That Helps You Stop Repeating the Same Patterns

YOU WILL FEEL BETTER

• YOU WILL FEEL BETTER •

UnPattern: Individual Coaching To Improve Your Relationship

Change How You Relate—Without Over-Analyzing or Starting Over.
Relationship coaching for people who want more clarity, steadiness, and self-trust in their relationships—without turning connection into a constant self-improvement project.

You don’t need a new relationship.

You need a new way of relating. You might be in a relationship that matters to you — and still feel stuck in familiar loops:

The same arguments keep resurfacing
You over-explain, shut down, or react in ways you don’t love
You feel torn between closeness and independence
You know your patterns intellectually… but they still run the show
You’re trying to grow within the relationship, not walk away from it

This isn’t a failure of communication. It’s a sign that old relational patterns are getting activated in real time.

What Relationship Coaching
Focuses On

Relationship coaching is about how you show up inside connection — not diagnosing you, analyzing your past endlessly, or assigning blame.

We work on:

Interrupting emotional reactivity as it’s happening
Understanding why certain moments feel disproportionately intense
Regulating your nervous system during conflict or closeness
Setting boundaries without guilt, shutdown, or over-explaining
Repairing ruptures without self-abandonment
Building differentiation: a solid me, a clear you, and a healthier us

The goal isn’t perfection. It’s relational self-leadership.

Is This Couples Coaching?

No. Relationship coaching is individual coaching focused on your side of the dynamic. You don’t need your partner present to shift how a relationship functions.
Change often starts with one regulated, self-led person.

How Coaching Is Different from Therapy

Relationship coaching is:

Forward-focused and action-oriented
Structured around patterns, clarity, and skill-building
Designed for people who want practical change now
Less about diagnosis, more about discernment and choice

Coaching is a good fit if:

You’re not in acute crisis
You want to work on relationship patterns without a clinical frame
You’re ready to apply insight in real time
You value direct feedback and practical tools

If therapy is the better fit, I’ll tell you that honestly.

Schedule a free Clarity Call

Common Reasons People Choose Relationship Coaching

“I want to work on my reactions without pathologizing myself.”
“I’m tired of cycling between closeness and distance.”
“I want to stay connected without losing myself.”
“I want clarity about what’s mine, what’s theirs, and what’s the dynamic.”
“I’ve done therapy before and want something more applied right now.”

Who This Is For

Relationship coaching is ideal for people who:

Are in a relationship and want it to feel steadier and more intentional
Feel emotionally activated but don’t want to default to blame or withdrawal
Want to stop repeating the same arguments in different forms
Are self-aware, growth-oriented, and ready to practice new ways of relating
Want support navigating relationships with integrity and clarity

You don’t need to be “bad at relationships” to benefit from coaching. You just need curiosity about how you relate under pressure.

What Coaching Looks Like

12 weeks, 1:1 sessions (45 minutes each)
Clear goals and structure
Real-time application to current relationship dynamics
Tools you can actually use between sessions
A balance of reflection and action

This work is collaborative, grounded, and honest—without being heavy or performative.

Practical Details

$1,1997

(Introductory Offer)

12 weeks long, 45-minutes per meeting
Individual, one-on-one coaching support for accountability
Psychology-informed, present focused application of the UnPattern framework in real time
Premium workbook included

Let Me Guide You Through This…

Ready to Work Together?

If you’re ready to stop reacting on autopilot and start relating with more clarity, steadiness, and self-trust — Relationship coaching may be the right next step.

Schedule You Free clarity call

Frequently Asked Questions

Below are the most common questions I’m asked about UnPattern: Relationships.

Can the UnPattern Framework help if I’m already in a relationship?

Yes—and this is often where it’s most powerful.
Being in a relationship doesn’t make patterns disappear; it activates them. UnPattern helps you recognize what’s happening inside you during real moments of conflict, closeness, or stress so you can respond with clarity instead of reacting on autopilot.

What if my partner is the one causing the issues?

That’s a common question—and an honest one. UnPattern doesn’t deny real relationship issues or unhealthy dynamics.
It helps you separate:

What’s actually happening now
From what’s being amplified by old patterns, nervous system responses, or learned coping strategies

That clarity makes it easier to decide what to address, what to let go of, and what actually needs to change.

Do I need to know my attachment style for this to work?

No. While attachment patterns may come up, UnPattern isn’t about labeling yourself or your partner. It’s about noticing how you respond under pressure and learning how to shift those responses in real time. Insight helps—but integration is what changes relationships.

Is this only for relationships that are struggling?

Not at all. Many people use UnPattern in generally healthy relationships where:

Communication is “good” but still feels effortful
Emotional reactions feel bigger than the situation
Growth feels uneven or confusing

UnPattern is for people who want to relate more consciously, not just fix problems.

What if I’m unsure whether to stay in my relationship?

UnPattern doesn’t push you toward staying or leaving. It helps you:

Get out of emotional urgency
Understand what’s yours vs. what’s relational
Make decisions from clarity instead of fear, guilt, or habit

Sometimes clarity strengthens a relationship. Sometimes it reveals necessary change. Either way, you’re not deciding from a spiral.

Is this couples therapy?

No. UnPattern is individual, psychology-informed work focused on how you show up in relationships. You don’t need your partner present—or even participating—for the framework to be effective.
When one person changes how they relate, the entire dynamic often shifts.

Will this help with recurring arguments or emotional cycles?

Yes. That’s one of its core applications.

UnPattern focuses on:

Why the same arguments keep resurfacing
What gets activated beneath the surface
How to interrupt the cycle before it escalates—or shuts down

The goal isn’t to avoid conflict. It’s to repair faster and relate more honestly.

Can UnPattern help if I feel emotionally reactive or shut down in my relationship?

Yes. UnPattern works at the level of:

Emotional regulation
Nervous system responses
Behavioral reflexes

Whether you tend to over-explain, people-please, withdraw, or spiral internally, the framework helps you slow things down and choose a different response—without forcing yourself to be someone you’re not.

How is this different from just “communicating better”?

Communication advice often focuses on what to say. UnPattern focuses on:

What’s happening internally before you speak
Why certain conversations feel charged
How emotional safety (or threat) shapes communication

When internal patterns shift, communication improves naturally—without scripts or performance.

Is this therapy or coaching?

It depends on the format you choose.

Digital Intensives → self-paced, educational, practical
Coaching Programs → structured, forward-focused support
Therapy → licensed mental health treatment

Each option applies the UnPattern framework differently, so you can choose the level of support that fits your needs.

What kind of results can I expect?

Most people report:

Less emotional reactivity
Faster repair after conflict
Clearer boundaries and communication
A stronger sense of self within the relationship

The goal isn’t perfection. It’s self-led connection—even when things feel uncomfortable.

Where should I start?

If you want tools you can apply immediately, start with a Digital Intensive.
If you want ongoing, structured guidance, explore Coaching Programs.
If you want deeper therapeutic work, Therapy may be the best fit.

Best for:
- Pattern recognition
- Practical tools
- Self-paced clarity
- People who want structure without pressure
Think: “I want to understand what’s happening—and interrupt it on my own schedule”
Learn more
Best for:
- Repatterning in real time
- Accountability
- Dating discernment
- Building confidence and emotional steadiness
Think:“I want one-on-one structured support with real-time practice and feedback.”
Learn more
Best for:
- Emotional distress or overwhelm
- Trauma, attachment wounds, or mental health concerns
- Deep relational healing
- Ongoing support
Think:“This isn’t just about dating—it’s affecting my life and well-being.”
Learn more

Stuck in a loop and need more insight? Get started with our free resources.

Blog & Free Resources

Best for:

Early curiosity
Normalizing experiences
Light insight and language

Not ideal if: You’re stuck in a loop or need support applying insight.

More FAQs

This is a very common question! In addition to my PhD in Clinical Psychology, I also have a coaching certificate and can assist at whichever level you’re ready for.
Coaching meetings are psychology-informed, structured, focused, and practical. We apply the UnPattern framework to your life to clearly identify patterns, and apply insight to real-time choices. This is intentional coaching focused on the present and future to help propel you into change.
Therapy sessions create a safe space to process emotions, heal from past wounds understand yourself on a deep level, and provides mental health treatment. We aim to understand the past, explore the present and build a future that feels uniquely individualized to you. Therapy is only available in California, Colorado, and Utah as those are the states that I hold licenses in.
Schedule a quick clarity call to connect and notice how you feel talking to that person. Finding a therapist or coach that you vibe with is one of the most significant factors in reaching your goals and having a good experience.
Schedule a clarity call and let’s see if we’re a good fit to help you on your journey.
First off, congrats on the self-awareness! Should this arise we’d talk about it and handle it openly and ethically. Your wellbeing always comes first!
If it becomes clear that therapy would better support you, we’ll pause and discuss appropriate next steps. You can also use PsychologyToday.com to find a therapist in your area.