💔 Going Through a Breakup?
You’re In The Right Place. Support for heartbreak, loss, and the aftermath of a relationship ending.
ELEVATE THE WAY YOU LIVE
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ELEVATE THE WAY YOU LIVE •
Breakups don’t just end relationships.
They disrupt attachment, identity, routines, and your sense of emotional safety.
If you’re feeling untethered, stuck, or not quite yourself after a breakup—individual therapy offers a place to slow down, make sense of what happened, and begin rebuilding from the inside out.
This is therapy for people who want to heal without bypassing, rushing, or pretending they’re fine.
This might be right for you if…
You keep replaying conversations or questioning what went wrong
You feel emotionally raw, numb, or stuck in between
The breakup brought up anxiety, grief, or old wounds
You’re struggling with closure, longing, or mixed emotions
You know the relationship wasn’t right—but it still hurts deeply
You want to move forward without repeating the same pattern
Breakup pain doesn’t mean you failed. It means something meaningful ended.
What We Work On Together
Breakup therapy helps you:
Process grief and loss without getting trapped in rumination
Understand why the relationship affected you so deeply
Calm attachment-driven urges to fix, reach out, or rewrite the past
Separate what actually happened from self-blame or idealization
Rebuild emotional steadiness, self-trust, and clarity
Integrate the experience instead of carrying it forward unresolved
Not by erasing the relationship — but by understanding it honestly and letting it take its rightful place in your story.
This Is Not “Just Getting Over It”
Breakup therapy isn’t about:
Forcing closure
Being told to move on
Turning your ex into the villain
Or pretending it didn’t matter
It is about:
Making meaning of the loss
Regulating the nervous system after emotional disruption
Understanding attachment patterns activated by the breakup
Creating a grounded path forward—at your pace
Healing doesn’t happen by pushing feelings away. It happens by relating to them differently.
Do I Need Closure Before Starting Therapy?
No.
In fact, therapy can help you understand what closure actually means—and why waiting for it from another person often keeps you stuck.
Closure is something you build, not something you receive.
Let Me Guide You Through This…
Working with me helps you:
Not by rushing healing. Not by pretending you’re “fine.” — but by understanding what happened, honoring what you feel, and changing how you relate to loss, attachment, and yourself.
Stop seeking closure from the person who couldn’t give it
Break attachment loops that keep pulling you back to what hurts
Rebuild clarity, self-trust, and emotional steadiness—on your own timeline
Learn how to grieve without losing yourself in the process
Make sense of the breakup without replaying every conversation
Understand why it ended—without blaming yourself or idealizing the past
Calm the emotional swings instead of spiraling, numbing out, or staying stuck in limbo
What Breakup Therapy Can Support
Sudden or unexpected breakups
Long-term relationships ending
On-again/off-again dynamics
Situationships that never fully resolved
Breakups that reopened old wounds
Grief mixed with relief, anger, or confusion
There’s no “right” kind of breakup to deserve support.
If it affected you, it matters.
What to Expect From the Process
Therapy isn’t a quick fix—but it is supportive, structured, and intentional.
You can expect:
A space where you don’t have to perform or have it figured out
Honest conversations without judgment
Support in understanding yourself more clearly
Tools that help you feel steadier over time
Change happens gradually, and that’s okay.
Practical Details
45-minutes weekly or bi-weekly
Evidenced-based, psychodynamic, relational, and pattern-focused
Offering In-Person (Cardiff-By-The-Sea, San Diego, California) and Telehealth sessions to those in California, Colorado, and Utah
Licensure: Phd in Clinical Psychology
Therapy is confidential and conducted according to professional and ethical standards.
The Breakup Recovery Quiz
Where are you on the path to healing and Thriving Solo?
The 5 Stages of Breakup Recovery:
Stage 1: Raw Pain & Denial
Stage 2: Anger & Bargaining
Stage 3: Processing & Acceptance
Stage 4: Rebuilding & Growth
Stage 5: Thriving Solo
Frequently Asked Questions
Below are the most common questions I hear about Thriving Solo:
How do I know if I’m actually over my breakup?
You’re not “over it” when you stop thinking about them—you’re over it when your nervous system calms down around the memory. The opposite of love isn’t hate; it’s indifference and neutrality. If the thought of them no longer hijacks your mood or decisions, you’re healing.
How long does it really take to get over a breakup?
There’s no universal timeline—and anyone who gives you one is oversimplifying.Healing depends on attachment patterns, emotional investment, how it ended, and what the relationship symbolized—not just how long it lasted and the intensity of the relationship.
How do I stop checking their social media?
First: stop judging yourself for wanting to.Then: create friction. Unfollow, mute, block if needed. Healing requires fewer triggers—not more willpower.
Continuing to follow them on social media is not only hurtful to you but your brain has a hard time separating when it sees them right there in their posts - your brain doesn’t know the difference between real life and social media. It just prolongs the heartbreak and makes it harder to heal (not to mention: cues up obsessive, overthinking that you probably don’t need any more of right now).
Should I start dating again to “move on”?
Dating too soon can distract—but it rarely heals. It can also backfire because you’re most likely comparing everyone to your ex - and only to the nostalgic, rose-colored-glasses filter.The better question is: Am I dating from clarity or for pain relief?
What if I’m afraid I’ll never feel that way again?
That fear is common—and rarely accurate, I promise!Breakups collapse future fantasies along with the relationship. What you’re grieving isn’t just the person—it’s the imagined life you thought you were creating with them.
Why does the breakup still hurt even though I know it was the right decision?
Because emotional attachment doesn’t dissolve on command. Logic and attachment live in different parts of the brain. Knowing it was right doesn’t mean it wasn’t still a loss.
Attachment is about familiarity, not compatibility.Missing someone doesn’t mean they were right for you—it often means your system hasn’t recalibrated yet.
Should I stay friends with my ex?
Maybe—later.Friendship right after a breakup often delays healing, especially if there are unresolved feelings, hope, or confusion. Distance isn’t punishment; it’s regulation.
Why do I keep replaying conversations or wondering what I did wrong?
Your brain is trying to create certainty after emotional disruption.Rumination isn’t a flaw—it’s a stress response. The goal isn’t to “stop thinking,” but to understand why your mind is looping and how to interrupt it.
Is it normal to want closure even when I know I won’t get it?
Yes. Completely.But closure rarely comes from the other person—it comes from understanding the relationship clearly enough that you stop asking questions it can’t answer.
Why do breakups mess with my confidence so much?
Because rejection activates core attachment fears: Am I enough? Was I replaceable? Did I misread everything?A breakup can shake your whole identity—not just emotions.
How do I know which starting point is right for me?
Different seasons require different levels of support. This isn’t a hierarchy. It’s a continuum. Many people move between: Blogs → Digital Intensive → Coaching → Therapy —or combine them intentionally.
How do I know if I need therapy, coaching, or something else?
If you want insight and structure: a digital intensive
If you want accountability and application: coaching
If you feel emotionally overwhelmed or distressed: therapy
Choose your path
Who this is for and how you can benefit from working with Dr. Lindsay
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Best for:
Pattern recognition
Practical tools
Self-paced clarity
People who want structure without pressure
Think: “I want to understand what’s happening—and interrupt it on my own schedule”
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Best for:
Repatterning in real time
Accountability
Dating discernment
Building confidence and emotional steadiness
Think:“I want one-on-one structured support with real-time practice and feedback.”
Learn more
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Best for:
Emotional distress or overwhelm
Trauma, attachment wounds, or mental health concerns
Deep relational healing
Ongoing support
Think:“This isn’t just about dating—it’s affecting my life and well-being.”
Stuck in a loop and need more insight? Get started with our free resources.
Blog & Free Resources
Best for:
Early curiosity
Normalizing experiences
Light insight and language
Not ideal if: You’re stuck in a loop or need support applying insight.
More FAQs
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This is a very common question! In addition to my PhD in Clinical Psychology, I also have a coaching certificate and can assist at whichever level you’re ready for.
Coachingmeetings are psychology-informed, structured, focused, and practical. We apply the UnPattern framework to your life to clearly identify patterns, and apply insight to real-time choices. This is intentional coaching focused on the present and future to help propel you into change.
Therapy sessions create a safe space to process emotions, heal from past wounds understand yourself on a deep level, and provides mental health treatment. We aim to understand the past, explore the present and build a future that feels uniquely individualized to you. Therapy is only available in California, Colorado, and Utah as those are the states that I hold licenses in.
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Schedule a quick clarity call to connect and notice how you feel talking to that person. Finding a therapist or coach that you vibe with is one of the most significant factors in reaching your goals and having a good experience.
Schedule a clarity call and let’s see if we’re a good fit to help you on your journey.
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First off, congrats on the self-awareness! Should this arise we’d talk about it and handle it openly and ethically. Your wellbeing always comes first!
If it becomes clear that therapy would better support you, we’ll pause and discuss appropriate next steps. You can also use PsychologyToday.com to find a therapist in your area.
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Unsure of where to begin?
Call Dr. Lindsay for a Free Clarity Call or Take the below Quiz to start your Adventure!