💔 Going through a breakup?
You’re In The Right Place
ELEVATE THE WAY YOU LIVE
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ELEVATE THE WAY YOU LIVE •
Your brain on heartbreak looks the same as when your brain on cocaine withdrawal.
The spiraling thoughts? The feeling of obsession? The way you can't stop checking their Instagram at 2am even though you know it'll hurt? The physical ache in your chest that feels like someone actually reached in and broke something?
That's not weakness. That's neurochemistry.
Your brain is literally in withdrawal.
Breakups can be incredibly painful - whether you were anti-labels, Friends With Benefits, Situationships, living together, married - they all hurt! This hurt can tell us important info about who you are and how you can grow so you don’t get into this exact same situation next time.
They reveal who you are under stress. How you regulate. What you do when you're in pain. Whether you can sit with discomfort or need to numb it immediately. (This is hard, I know!).
They also show you: What you tolerated in relationships that maybe you shouldn't have. What you ignored. What attachment pattern is being repeated. What you need to work on before the next relationship.
Breakups aren't just endings. They're information.
About them. About you. About what wasn't working.
You’re going to be okay.
But, let’s make it so you learn and grow from this experience rather than a cycle-rinse-repeat for the next time.
This breakup—even though it hurts like crazy right now—might be the thing that finally gets you to look at your patterns. Why you chose them. Why you stayed. Why it ended the way it did. What you keep repeating.
That awareness is worth gold.
Not now. Now you just need to survive the withdrawal.
But later? Later, you get to choose differently.
SO MUCH GROWTH CAN COME FROM BREAKUPS IF YOU’RE ABLE TO WORK THROUGH IT.
You don’t have to do it alone, Dr. Lindsay can help.
Struggling to move forward after a breakup?
Learn why your brain is obsessing, how to actually process grief (not bypass it), and how to find closure without them.
Let Me Guide You Through This…
Working with me helps you:
Make sense of the breakup without replaying every conversation
Understand why it ended—without blaming yourself or idealizing the past
Calm the emotional swings instead of spiraling, numbing out, or staying stuck in limbo
Stop seeking closure from the person who couldn’t give it
Break attachment loops that keep pulling you back to what hurts
Rebuild clarity, self-trust, and emotional steadiness—on your own timeline
Learn how to grieve without losing yourself in the process
Not by rushing healing.
Not by pretending you’re “fine.”
—but by understanding what happened, honoring what you feel,
and changing how you relate to loss, attachment, and yourself.
Ways to Work With Me
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Digital Intensives
Self-Paced, Online
For when you feel something’s off and are ready to start exploring it.
Intensives are short, psycho-educational programs to help you begin to recognize your patterns, get tools for self-practice, regain clarity, and revive your emotional footing.
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1:1 Coaching Programs
Guided to Go Deeper
For when you see the pattern and want individualized, structure, accountability, and guidance applying insights in real time.
You understand what’s happening. Let’s actually change it, together!
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Individual Therapy
Therapeutic - Get foundational
For when you want personalized, deep pattern processing work tailored to your life - past, present, and future.
You’re looking for a supportive, therapeutic relationship to unpack and unpattern your history to fully understand yourself and reach your goals.
The Breakup Recovery Quiz
Where are you on the path to healing and Thriving Solo?
The 5 Stages of Breakup Recovery:
Stage 1: Raw Pain & Denial
Stage 2: Anger & Bargaining
Stage 3: Processing & Acceptance
Stage 4: Rebuilding & Growth
Stage 5: Thriving Solo
Frequently Asked Questions
Below are the most common questions I hear about Thriving Solo:
How do I know if I’m actually over my breakup?
You’re not “over it” when you stop thinking about them—you’re over it when your nervous system calms down around the memory. The opposite of love isn’t hate; it’s indifference and neutrality. If the thought of them no longer hijacks your mood or decisions, you’re healing.
How long does it really take to get over a breakup?
There’s no universal timeline—and anyone who gives you one is oversimplifying.
Healing depends on attachment patterns, emotional investment, how it ended, and what the relationship symbolized—not just how long it lasted and the intensity of the relationship.
How do I stop checking their social media?
First: stop judging yourself for wanting to.
Then: create friction. Unfollow, mute, block if needed. Healing requires fewer triggers—not more willpower.
Continuing to follow them on social media is not only hurtful to you but your brain has a hard time separating when it sees them right there in their posts - your brain doesn’t know the difference between real life and social media. It just prolongs the heartbreak and makes it harder to heal (not to mention: cues up obsessive, overthinking that you probably don’t need any more of right now).
Should I start dating again to “move on”?
Dating too soon can distract—but it rarely heals. It can also backfire because you’re most likely comparing everyone to your ex - and only to the nostalgic, rose-colored-glasses filter.
The better question is: Am I dating from clarity or for pain relief?
What if I’m afraid I’ll never feel that way again?
That fear is common—and rarely accurate, I promise!
Breakups collapse future fantasies along with the relationship. What you’re grieving isn’t just the person—it’s the imagined life you thought you were creating with them.
How do I know if I need therapy, coaching, or something else?
If you want insight and structure: a digital intensive
If you want accountability and application: coaching
If you feel emotionally overwhelmed or distressed: therapy
Why does the breakup still hurt even though I know it was the right decision?
Because emotional attachment doesn’t dissolve on command. Logic and attachment live in different parts of the brain. Knowing it was right doesn’t mean it wasn’t still a loss.
Attachment is about familiarity, not compatibility.
Missing someone doesn’t mean they were right for you—it often means your system hasn’t recalibrated yet.
Should I stay friends with my ex?
Maybe—later. Friendship right after a breakup often delays healing, especially if there are unresolved feelings, hope, or confusion. Distance isn’t punishment; it’s regulation.
Why do I keep replaying conversations or wondering what I did wrong?
Your brain is trying to create certainty after emotional disruption.
Rumination isn’t a flaw—it’s a stress response. The goal isn’t to “stop thinking,” but to understand why your mind is looping and how to interrupt it.
Is it normal to want closure even when I know I won’t get it?
Yes. Completely.
But closure rarely comes from the other person—it comes from understanding the relationship clearly enough that you stop asking questions it can’t answer.
Why do breakups mess with my confidence so much?
Because rejection activates core attachment fears: Am I enough? Was I replaceable? Did I misread everything?
A breakup can shake your whole identity—not just emotions.
How do I know which starting point is right for me?
Different seasons require different levels of support. This isn’t a hierarchy. It’s a continuum. Many people move between: Blogs → Digital Intensive → Coaching → Therapy —or combine them intentionally.
Choose your path
Who this is for and how you can benefit from working with Dr. Lindsay
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Best for:
Pattern recognition
Practical tools
Self-paced clarity
People who want structure without pressure
Think: “I want to understand what’s happening—and interrupt it on my own schedule”
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Best for:
Repatterning in real time
Accountability
Dating discernment
Building confidence and emotional steadiness
Think:“I want one-on-one structured support with real-time practice and feedback.”
Learn more
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Best for:
Emotional distress or overwhelm
Trauma, attachment wounds, or mental health concerns
Deep relational healing
Ongoing support
Think:“This isn’t just about dating—it’s affecting my life and well-being.”
Stuck in a loop and need more insight? Get started with our free resources.
More FAQs
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This is a very common question! In addition to my PhD in Clinical Psychology, I also have a coaching certificate and can assist at whichever level you’re ready for.Coaching meetings are psychology-informed, structured, focused, and practical. We apply the UnPattern framework to your life to clearly identify patterns, and apply insight to real-time choices. This is intentional coaching focused on the present and future to help propel you into change.
Therapy sessions create a safe space to process emotions, heal from past wounds understand yourself on a deep level, and provides mental health treatment. We aim to understand the past, explore the present and build a future that feels uniquely individualized to you. Therapy is only available in California, Colorado, and Utah as those are the states that I hold licenses in.
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Schedule a quick clarity call to connect and notice how you feel talking to that person. Finding a therapist or coach that you vibe with is one of the most significant factors in reaching your goals and having a good experience.
Schedule a clarity call and let’s see if we’re a good fit to help you on your journey.
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First off, congrats on the self-awareness! Should this arise we’d talk about it and handle it openly and ethically. Your wellbeing always comes first!
If it becomes clear that therapy would better support you, we’ll pause and discuss appropriate next steps. You can also use PsychologyToday.com to find a therapist in your area.
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Unsure of where to begin?
Call Dr. Lindsay for a Free Clarity Call
or Take the below Quiz to start your Adventure!